Maulana Ashraf Ali Thanvi Rahmatullah Alaihi
|Table of Contents|
Rights of Husband
|The Rights of Parents|
|The Rights of Muslims|
|Rights of the Neighbour|
|Rights of the Traveling Companion|
|Rights of the Weak and Old|
|Rights of Human beings|
|Rights of Animals|
|The Virtues and Rights of Marriage|
TaAla has given great rights to the husband and has attached a lot of virtue to
him. Pleasing the husband and keeping him happy is a great act of ‘ibadah
and displeasing him or keeping him unhappy is a major sin.
Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said: "The woman who
offers her five times salat, fasts in the month of Ramadan,
protects her honour and respect, and obeys her husband has the choice of
entering jannah from whichever door she wishes to enter from." This
means that from the eight doors of jannah she can enter through whichever
door she wishes without even having to knock on that door.
Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said: "The woman who
passes away in such a state that her husband is pleased with her will enter jannah."
Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said: "Were I to
command anyone to prostrate to anyone other than Allah, I would have commanded
the woman to prostrate to her husband. If the husband orders his wife to carry
the boulders of one mountain to the next mountain, and the boulders of the next
mountain to a third mountain, she will have to do this."
Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said: "When the
husband calls his wife, she should go immediately to him even if she is busy at
her stove." In other words, no matter how important a task she may be busy
with, she should leave it and go to him.
Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said: "When a man
calls his wife to engage in sexual intercourse with him and she does not go and
because of this he sleeps away angrily, the angels continue cursing this woman
till the morning."
Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said: "When a woman
troubles or displeases her husband in this world, the hűr of jannah
that has been set aside for him says: "May
Allah curse you! Do not trouble him. He is your guest for a few days. Soon he
will leave you and come to me."
Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said: "There are three
types of people whose salat is not accepted, nor is any other good act of
theirs accepted. One is a slave who runs away from his master. The second is a
woman whose husband is displeased with her. The third is a person who is in a
state of intoxication."
A person asked: "Who
is the best woman?" Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam
replied: "The best woman
is one who pleases her husband when he looks at her, when he asks her to do
something she obeys him, and she does not do anything that may displease him
with regard to his wealth and honour."
of the rights of the husband is that the wife should not keep any optional fasts
nor offer any optional salat in his presence without his permission.
Among the rights of the husband is that she should not remain in an untidy,
dishevelled state. Instead, she should always remain clean and beautiful for her
husband. In fact, if she remains untidy and dishevelled despite her husband
ordering her to remain clean, he has the right of beating her (lightly) in order
that she may obey him. Another right of the husband is that she should not leave
the house without his permission irrespective of whether it be the house of a
friend, relative or anyone else.
You should not cause them any harm even if they commit any excesses.
Respect and honour them in your speech and dealings with them.
Obey them in permissible acts.
If they are in need of money, assist them even if they are kafirs.
The following rights are due to parents after their death:
Continue making duas of forgiveness and mercy for them. Continue sending
rewards to them in the form of optional acts of worship and charity on their
Meet their friends and relatives in a friendly way and also assist them wherever
If you have the finances, fulfil their unpaid debts and the permissible bequests
that they have made.
When they pass away, abstain from crying and wailing aloud or else their souls
will be troubled.
According to the Shariah, the rights of the paternal and maternal
grandparents are similar to those of the parents and they should be regarded as
Similarly, the rights of the maternal and paternal uncles and aunts are similar
to those of the parents. This has been deduced from certain Ahadith. (Rasulullah
sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said: "The maternal
aunt has the status of one’s mother." - Tirmidhi)
Meet her with respect. If she
is in need of money and you are able to help her, then help her.
Since she is an associate of
your father, and we have been commanded to be kind and friendly to our parents'
associates, the step-mother, therefore, also has certain rights over you as
In the light of the Hadith, the
elder brother is similar to one's father. From this we can deduce that the
younger brother is similar to one's children. Based on this, they will have
rights similar to those of parents and children. The elder sister and the
younger sister should also be treated in the same manner.
If any of your blood relatives
is in need and is unable to earn, help him out with his expenses according to
your financial position. Go and meet them occasionally. Do not cut-off relations
with them. In fact, even if they cause you harm, it will be best for you to
In the Quran, Allah Ta'ala has
mentioned the in-laws together with one's lineage. We learn from this that the
father-in-law, mother-in-law, wife's brother, sister's husband, son-in-law,
daughter-in-law, the previous children of the wife, the previous children of the
husband - all of these have certain rights. Therefore, you have to be more
considerate to them as opposed to others.
Overlook the faults of a Muslim.
When he cries, have mercy on him.
Conceal his shortcomings.
Accept his excuses.
Remove his difficulties.
Always be good to him.
Gaining his love is an accomplishment.
Fulfil his promises.
When he falls ill, visit him.
When he passes away, make dua for him.
Accept his invitation.
Accept his gifts.
When he shows kindness to you, show kindness to him in return.
Be grateful for his favours upon you.
Help and assist him at the time of need.
Safeguard his family and children.
Assist him in his work.
Listen to his advice.
Accept his intercession.
Do not make him feel despondent over his ambitions.
When he sneezes and says "Alhamdulillah", say "Yarhamukallah" in reply.
If you find a lost item of his, return it to him.
Reply to his greeting.
When you converse with him, speak with humility and in a good manner.
Be kind and friendly to him.
When he takes an oath with regard to you, confident that you will fulfil it, then you must fulfil it. (For example, Zayd takes an oath that Amr never goes to the bazaar and he is confident that Amr will fulfil this oath of his, then Amr must ensure that he does not act contrary to it.)
If anyone oppresses him, go to his assistance. If he oppresses someone, prevent him.
Be friendly to him and do not antagonize him.
Do not disgrace him.
Whatever you like for yourself, like for him as well.
When you meet him, make salam to him. If a man shakes the hand of a man, and a woman shakes the hand of a woman, it will be even better.
If a quarrel takes place between the two of you, do not cut-off speaking to him for more than three days.
Do not have evil thoughts of him.
Do not be jealous of him nor should you hate him.
Direct him towards good deeds and stop him from evil deeds.
Have mercy on the young and respect the elderly.
If there is a conflict between two Muslims, try and reconcile them.
Do not speak ill of him.
Do not cause him any loss; neither in his wealth nor in his honour.
If he is sitting, do not make him get up and take his place.
Deal with him in a nice and
Protect the honour of his
wife and children.
Occasionally you should
send gifts to his house. Especially if he is poor. In such a case you should
definitely send some food to him.
Do not cause him any harm.
Do not quarrel with him over trivial matters.
Just as a person has a neighbour at home, he also has a neighbour when travelling. That is, a travelling companion with whom you embark on a journey or coincidentally joins you during the course of the journey. The rights of such a person are similar to those of a neighbour.
His rights can be summed up
as follows: give
preference to his comfort over your own comfort. Some people display a lot
of selfishness with regard to other travellers when travelling by train or
other modes of public transportation. This is a very evil habit.
Those people who are in need,
such as orphans, widows, the weak, the poor, the sick, the cripple, travellers,
beggars, etc. have additional rights. They are:
1. You should help them
2. You should undertake their tasks with your own hands and legs.
3. You should console and comfort them.
4. You should not refuse to fulfill their needs and wants.
Do not cause financial or physical harm to innocent people.
Do not argue with anyone
without any valid Shar'i reason.
If you find someone in problem, in poverty, or sick, help him, feed him, treat his sickness.
When meting out punishment,
do not transgress the limits in the different methods of punishment that
have been laid down in the ShariAh.
Do not encage an animal
which you will not be taking any benefit from. Removing nestlings from their
nests, causing harm to their parents, etc. is a sign of extreme
An animal that is suitable
for consumption should not be killed merely for amusement.
You should make proper
arrangements with regard to food, drink, providing rest, and taking care for
the animal that you utilise for your work. Do not impose any work on it that
is beyond its capacity, nor should you beat it more than necessary.
The animal that is to be
slaughtered or killed on account of it being harmful should be slaughtered
or killed quickly. Do not cause it any agitation. Do not take its life after
having starved it.
If there is any shortcoming in
fulfilling the rights of a person, fulfil that which can be fulfilled or else,
ask for forgiveness. For example, you are still owing someone some money or you
cheated someone, etc. (In such a case you should try and pay the debt, but if
you cannot do so, then seek forgiveness from the person). As for the right which
can only be forgiven, seek forgiveness for it, e.g. you spoke ill of a person or
beat him (In such a case, it is obvious that you cannot pay him anything.
Instead, you will have to seek his forgiveness).
If, due to some reason, you
cannot fulfil their rights nor can you seek their forgiveness, then you should
continue making dua for these people. It is possible that on the day of
judgement Allah Ta'ala will try and influence them to forgive you. However,
later if you are in a position to fulfil their rights or seek their forgiveness,
then do not hesitate in doing so.
As for the rights that are due
to you and there is a hope of their being fulfilled, then be lenient when asking
for them. As for those where there is no hope of their being fulfilled or, they
are such that they cannot be fulfilled, such as ghibah, then although
there is the hope of your receiving rewards in return for them on the day of
judgement, however, more reward has been mentioned with regard to forgiving them
in this world. It will be much better if you forgive them completely or absolve
them completely. This is especially when the person earnestly seeks forgiveness
1. It is mentioned in a Hadith
that this world has been created to be utilised and that of all the things that
are utilised in this world, there is nothing better than a pious woman. In other
words, if a person is fortunate enough to get a pious wife, it will be a great
blessing. It is also a mercy from Allah Ta'ala that she is actually a comfort
for the husband and a means for his success in this world and in the hereafter.
A person enjoys comfort from such a woman for his worldly needs and she also
assists him in fulfilling his religious duties.
2. It is mentioned in a Hadith
that Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said:
"Marriage is my way and my
sunnah." "The one who does not act upon my sunnah is not
of me." That is, there is no relationship between him and me. This is
actually a warning and a threat to the one who does not practice on the sunnah
and a mention of Rasulullah's sallallahu alayhi wa sallam anger on
such a person. It is therefore necessary to be extremely cautious in this
regard. Furthermore, how can a Muslim bear to have Rasulullah sallallahu
alayhi wa sallam displeased with him for even a moment. May Allah Ta'ala
grant us death before that day comes when a Muslim is able to bear the
displeasure of Allah and His Rasűl sallallahu alayhi wa sallam.
It is mentioned in a Hadith
that Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said:
"Marry so that I can be
proud (of your numbers) on the day of judgement over the other nations." In
other words, Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam likes his ’ummah
to be in large numbers and more than the other nations. If this happens, his ’ummah
will be carrying out more good deeds, and in so doing he will receive more
rewards and gain closer proximity to Allah Ta'ala. This is because whoever from
his ’ummah does good deeds, does so through his teachings. Therefore,
the more people who act on his teachings, the more reward he will receive for
conveying those teachings. We also learn from this that whenever and however
possible, we should undertake to carry out those tasks and actions that will
take us closer to Allah Ta'ala, and that we should not display any laziness in
It is mentioned in a Hadith
that on the day of judgement the people will be standing in 120 lines. Out of
these, 40 lines of people will be from the other nations while 80 lines of
people will be from the ’ummah of Rasulullah sallallahu
alayhi wa sallam. Glory be to Allah! How beloved Rasulullah sallallahu
alayhi wa sallam is to Him.
The one who is able to (fulfil
the rights of a wife) should marry. As for the one who does not have sufficient
wealth (to fulfil the rights of a wife), he should fast. That is, he should fast
so that there will be a decrease in his desires. Fasting is actually a means of
curbing his desires. If a person does not have a very dire need for women, and
instead has an average need, and he is able to pay for her basic necessities,
then nikah is sunnat-e-mu’akkadah for such a person. As for the
person who has a very urgent need, nikah will be fard upon
him. This is because there is a fear that he will commit adultery and thereby
get the sin of committing a haram act. If a person has a very
urgent need but is financially incapable of maintaining a wife, then such a
person must fast abundantly. Later, when he has sufficient funds to maintain a
wife, he must get married.
3. It is mentioned in a Hadith
that children are the flowers of jannah. This means that the amount of
joy and happiness one will experience on seeing the flowers of paradise, that
same amount of joy and happiness is experienced when he looks at his children.
And we know fully well that children can only be obtained through marriage.
4. It is mentioned in a Hadith
that when the status of a person is increased in jannah, he asks out of
did I receive all this?" (That is, "How did I receive such a high
status when I hadn't carried out so many good deeds to deserve such a
status?") It will be said to this person that this high status is on
account of your children asking for forgiveness on your behalf. In other words,
your children had asked for forgiveness on your behalf. In return for that, you
have been accorded this status.
5. It is mentioned that the
child who is born out of a miscarriage (i.e. it is born before the due date)
will "fight"(wrangle) with its Creator when its parents are entered
into jahannam. In other words, this child will go to extremes in
interceding on behalf of its parents and will ask Allah Ta'ala to remove its
parents from jahannam. Through His bounty, Allah Ta'ala will accept the
intercession of this child and He will be soft and lenient towards it. It will
be said to this child: "O
siqt (which means, miscarried foetus) who is quarrelling with its
Lord! Enter your parents into jannah." So this child will draw its
parents out of jahannam with its navel cord and enter both of them into jannah.
We learn from this, that children of this sort, who are actually a by-product of
marriage, will also be of help in the hereafter.
6. It is mentioned in a Hadith
that when the husband and wife look at each other (with love), Allah Ta'ala
looks at both of them with mercy.
7. It is mentioned in a Hadith
that Allah Ta'ala has taken it upon Himself (i.e. out of His mercy, He as taken
the responsibility) of helping the person who gets married in order to attain
purity from that which Allah has made haram. In other words, the
person who marries in order to save himself from adultery with the intention of
obeying Allah Ta'ala, Allah will help and assist him in his expenses and other
8. It is mentioned in a Hadith
that two rakats of salat performed by a married person is better than 82
rakats performed by an unmarried person. In another Hadith, 70 rakats have been
mentioned instead of 82 rakats. It is possible that this means that 70 rakats
are written in favour of the person who fulfils the necessary rights of his wife
and family, and that 82 rakats are in favour of the person who apart from
fulfilling their necessary rights, serves them more with his life, wealth and
9. It is mentioned in a Hadith
that it is a major sin for a person to be neglectful with regard to those whom
he is responsible for (and to have shortcomings in fulfilling their needs).
10. It is mentioned in a Hadith
that Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said:
"I have not left behind
any test and tribulation on men more harmful than women." In other words,
of all the things that are harmful for men, women are the most harmful. This is
because, out of his love for a woman, a man loses all his senses, so much so
that he does not even take the commands and orders of Allah Ta'ala into
consideration. Therefore, a person must not fall in love with a woman in such a
way that he has to act contrary to the ShariAh. For example, her demands
for her food and clothing are more than what the husband can afford. In such
circumstances, never accept any bribes in order to supplement your present
income. Instead, give her from the halal earnings which Allah
Ta'ala has blessed you with. You should continue teaching your womenfolk and
inculcate respect and good manners in them. Do not allow them to become impudent
and disrespectful. The intellect of women is deficient; it is therefore
incumbent to take special measures in reforming them.
11. It is mentioned in a Hadith
that you should not propose to a girl when your fellow Muslim brother has
already proposed to her until he gets married or gives up this proposal. In
other words, when a person has sent a proposal to a particular family and there
is a likelihood of their replying in the affirmative, another person should not
send a proposal to that same family. However, if they reject this first person,
or he himself changes his mind, or they are not too happy with him and are still
hesitant in giving a reply, it will be permissible for another person to send a
proposal for the same girl.
The same rule applies to the
transactions of buying and selling. That is, if a person is busy buying or
selling something, then as long as they do not separate or abandon the
transaction, another person should not enter into their transaction and should
not offer a price above or below that which has been already offered when there
is an indication that they are about to come to an agreement. Understand this
well, and know that a kafir is also included in this rule.
12. It is mentioned in a Hadith
that a woman is either married because of her Din, her wealth or her
beauty. Choose the one with Din, may your hands become dusty. In other
words, a man may prefer a woman who is religiously inclined. While another may
prefer one who is wealthy. While yet another may prefer one who is beautiful.
However, Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam says that one
should choose a religiously inclined woman and that it is preferable to marry
such a woman. However, if the circumstances are such that a woman is very pious
but at the same time she is so ugly that one's nature does not find her
acceptable and there is a fear that if he marries such a woman there will be no
mutual understanding between them, and that he will be neglectful in fulfilling
her rights, then in such a case he should not marry such a woman. "May your
hands become dusty" is an Arabic mode of expression which is used on
different occasions. In this context, it is meant to create a yearning and a
desire for a pious woman.
13. It is mentioned in a Hadith
that the best wife is one whose mahr is very simple. That is, it is very
easy for the man to fulfil her mahr. These days, there is the habit of
specifying a very high mahr. People should abstain from this.
14. It is mentioned in a Hadith
that you should look for a good place for your sperms because a woman gives
birth to children that resemble her brothers and sisters. In other words, marry
a woman who comes from a pious and noble family because the children generally
resemble the maternal relations. Although the father also has some influence
over the child's resemblance, we learn from this Hadith that the mother's
influence is greater. If the wife is from a disreputable and irreligious family,
the children who will be born will be similar to that family. But if this is not
so, then the children who will be born will be pious and religious.
15. It is mentioned in a Hadith
that the greatest right that a woman has to fulfil is to her husband, and that
the greatest right that he has to fulfil is to his mother. In other words, after
the rights of Allah and His Rasűl sallallahu alayhi wa sallam the
woman has a very great right to fulfil to her husband, so much so that the
husband's rights supersede the rights of her parents. As for the man, after the
rights of Allah and His Rasűl sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, the
greatest right that he has to fulfil is to his mother. We learn from this that
the right of the mother supersedes that of the father.
16. It is mentioned in a Hadith
that if anyone of you wishes to engage in sexual intercourse with his wife, he
should recite the following duA:
The virtue of this duA
is that if a child is conceived through this intercourse, shaytan
will not be able to harm this child in any way.
17. There is a lengthy Hadith
in which Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam addressed Abdur Rahman
bin Auf radiyallahu anhu asking him to have a walimah even
if it is with one sheep. In other words, even if you possess very little, you
should spend. It is preferable to have the walimah after engaging in
sexual intercourse with one's bride. However, many ulama have permitted
it immediately after the nikah as well. It is mustahab to
have a walimah.
of Islamic Terms
who has attained a considerable amount of Islamic knowledge. He could also be
referred to as an Islamic scholar.
means "blessings". It refers to the experiencing of abundance in
things which are apparently insignificant or little, both in value and amount.
means "innovation". In Islam it refers to introducing new things into
religion, which have no basis in the Quran or Sunnah, and in addition to this,
to regard these new things as acts of Ibadah. A bid'ah is a major sin in Islam.
to Allah Ta'ala and asking Him for His forgiveness.
of a marriage after the husband's sworn testimony to have refrained from sexual
intercourse with his wife for a period of at least four months. For further
details, refer to the chapter on ila.
means "compulsory". In Islam it refers to those acts and things which
are compulsory on a Muslim. Abandoning or abstaining from a fard act is a major
sin. Rejecting a fard act amounts to kufr.
formal legal opinion or verdict in Islamic law.
mahram: Refers to all
those persons with whom marriage is permissible. Based on this, it is incumbent
to observe purdah with all ghayr mahrams.
periods or menstruation experienced by a woman.
means "pilgrimage". In Islam it refers to the annual pilgrimage to
which is lawful or permissible in Islam.
which is unlawful or prohibited in Islam.
to the large-eyed women of jannah, promised to the believers.
means "worship". In Islam it refers to all those acts of worship which
one renders to Allah Ta'ala.
period of waiting during which a woman may not remarry after being widowed or
divorced. For further details, refer to the chapter on ‘iddah.
pieces of unstitched cloth donned by the person performing hajj or umrah.
group, party, community.
means "a disbeliever". In Islam it refers to one who rejects Allah and
does not believe in Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam as
the final messenger of Allah.
means "penance, atonement, expiation". In Islamic law it refers to
redemption from the omission of certain religious duties by a material donation
or a ritual act. For further details, refer to the chapter on kaffarah.
at the instance of the wife who must pay a compensation. For further details,
refer to the chapter on khula'.
allegation of adultery committed by either husband or wife. For further details,
refer to the chapter on li'an.
means "a school". Also used to refer to a religious school.
means "evening or sunset". Also refers to the time of sunset and the
salat that is offered thereafter.
or bridal money.
to the person with whom marriage is not permissible and with whom strict purdah
is not incumbent.
dower or bridal money that is equal to or similar than that which was given to a
girl's paternal grandmothers. For further details, refer to the chapter on
means "an issue, problem or question". In Islamic jurisprudence, it
refers to a rule or regulation.
means "preferable or desirable". Refers to that act which was carried
out by Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam or the Sahabah
occasionally. Carrying out these actions entails reward and leaving them out
does not entail punishment.
vow or solemn pledge.
to the flowing of blood after child-birth.
Urdu word meaning "seclusion". It is an equivalent of the Arabic word
"hijab". Refers to the seclusion of women from strangers. There
are different stages of purdah, the highest of which is that the woman should
not come out of her home except for a valid Islamic reason.
means "carrying out or fulfilling". In Islamic jurisprudence it refers
to fulfilling or completing those duties that one may have missed out due to
some reason or the other.
heretical sect which regards Mirza Ghulam Ahmad Qadiani as a prophet of Allah.
Qadianis are regarded as disbelievers.
direction in which one faces when offering salat.
means "sacrifice". In Islam it refers to the sacrificing of animals
solely for the pleasure of Allah Ta'ala on the day of
Idul-adha and the two days following it.
ninth month of the Islamic calendar which is regarded as the most sacred month.
or the devil.
heretical sect found primarily in Iran.
Refers to those actions which
Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam carried out continuously.
It is a sin to leave out such a sunnah without any valid excuse.
to those who belong to the Ahlus Sunnah wal Jama'ah. This term is generally used
as an opposite to ShiAh.
A black powdery substance that is applied to the eyes. It is sunnah to apply
divorce that is issued in vague terms without clearly uttering the words of talaq.
divorce that is issued in clear terms without leaving any vagueness or doubt.
divorce which causes the annulment of the marriage. If a person wishes to retain
his wife to whom he had issued a talaqul ba'in, he will have to remarry
her, i.e. their nikah will have to be re-performed.
divorce which not only causes the annulment of the marriage, but if the couple
wish to remarry, the woman will have to marry another person first, when he
divorces her or passes away, only then can she remarry her first husband.
further details with regard to all the above forms of talaq, refer to the
means "community or nation". Here it refers to the Muslim community
means "obligatory". In Islamic jurisprudence it refers to that act
which has not been established by an absolute proof. Leaving out a wajib without
any valid reason makes one a fasiq and entails punishment.
the context of marriage or divorce, it refers to the legal guardian of a minor.
to the feast that is organized after a marriage. It usually takes place after
the bride and bride groom have spent a night together.
Literally means "purity or cleanliness". In Islamic
terminology it refers to the act of washing oneself before offering salat.
Likening one's wife to one's mother. It is a form of divorce.
For further details, refer to the chapter on zihar.